Therapy Isn't What You Think: 12 Common Myths About Mental Health Counseling
- Cassie Cain, MS, LPC, NCC
- 1 day ago
- 10 min read
By: Cassie Cain, MS, LPC, NCC
Many of us grew up in environments where mental health wasn’t a topic that people discussed or even acknowledged. If anything, at least for me, growing up in the early 2000’s meant growing up in a world that would hide and criticize people’s struggles - especially those related to topics like addiction, depression, suicide, neurodivergence, etc. It wasn't until high school that I learned that mental health was a real thing that impacts all of us deeply. I also learned that so much of what I thought I knew about mental health was in fact not true. This new understanding blew my world open and gave me a newfound understanding about my own struggles as well as the struggles of society and the people I love. Though we have come a long way from where the stigma around mental health used to be, there is still more work to be done. I’m excited to debunk some of these harmful myths through sharing my knowledge and experience on the topic.
Myth: “Mental health isn't real”
Fact: Mental health is very real, and consists of a number of factors that impact the ways that we think, feel, and behave.
Would you say that your physical health isn't real? Of course not! When we say mental health, we are referring to emotional, psychological, and social factors that have an impact on how we think, feel, and act. These factors have an important role in how we function. Like our physical health, our mental health is an extremely important part of our overall wellness, and they are so closely linked that they constantly influence one another. For example, if you have a physical illness that is keeping you bed-ridden, it is likely that you feel tired and possibly miserable. Conversely, if you are dealing with a high amount of stress at work or in relationships, you might notice that your body feels off (headaches, digestive distress, muscle tension, feeling weighed down, etc.) and that it is easier for you to get sick. So yes, your mental health is very real and it very much matters.
Myth: A therapist is going to judge/criticize me or not be able to understand me
Fact: Therapists are trained to have awareness of their own biases, assumptions and experiences, and a good therapist is going to meet you with compassion and non-judgement & will work very hard to understand you.
Mental health professionals are skilled in building relationships. We have years of training in how to actively listen, how to ask meaningful questions, and how to communicate our understanding to people. I believe that this myth often comes from fear related to past experiences where we have been judged or misunderstood. While the therapeutic fit is a vital part of the work that you do with a therapist and for sure, not every therapist is going to be a good fit, there are many who could be.
Though I can’t remember who said it or where I got it from, I once saw a quote that captured this idea perfectly. It went something like: “Every type of experience that a person struggles with has been experienced before, likely thousands or millions of times.” Sometimes we feel so alone in our struggles, but when you really think about it, there is no one unique human struggle. This goes to say that your experiences might be less unique than you think, and other people, and yes, therapists too, may be able to understand more than you think.
Myth: A therapist is just going to push medication on me.
Fact: If beneficial, a therapist may encourage you to consider the pros and cons of medication alongside psychotherapy, though a good and ethical therapist will respect your judgement, values, and decisions.
Many people mix up the different types of mental health services that exist. Commonly, psychotherapy and psychiatry. While there are a number of different branches, you can think of this in terms of two main branches:
Psychotherapy: also known as talk therapy, it is a treatment process used to help people manage mental health conditions, emotional difficulties, and life challenges. It involves talking with a trained professional to change harmful thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
Psychiatry: a branch of medicine focused on the diagnosis, treatment, and prevention of mental, emotional, and behavioral disorders. Psychiatrists prescribe medication.
Though we do know that the best treatment often involves a combination of both medication and talk therapy, every person is different. Professional counselors prioritize holistic wellness and client autonomy (the belief that you are the expert and you have control over your life and your choices), and if your counselor believes that medication could be helpful, they might suggest this to you and help you explore the pros and cons, but ultimately, it is your life, and you don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to do.
Myth: If I go to therapy, I am weak
Fact: Going to therapy shows courage and a willingness to ask for help (which is a crucial life skill).
Or put differently, “I shouldn't need help to…” Similar to myth #1 above, would you say this about going to a doctor when you have a broken arm? What about a lawyer? An accountant? A car mechanic? Would you say that you are dumb or stupid for not being able to fly a plane when you take a trip? Of course not! Each of these people are professionals with a high level of skill and knowledge in a specific area. One person can’t possibly hold all the knowledge in all of these areas to be an expert and function independently.
Just because we all drive cars doesn’t mean that we all know what to do when the car isn’t working. It’s no different with mental health. Just because we all have thoughts and feelings does not mean that we all have the knowledge to know where we are getting stuck repeating the same patterns. Mental health professionals are knowledgeable about mental health and able to help you identify where you keep getting stuck and how to help you get to a more effective way of being.
Actually if I were to reframe this I would say that for most of us making a change like going to therapy and being open about our struggles requires a lot of vulnerability that can be quite challenging. If anything I would say that confronting the things that make us feel scared or anxious is really more of a sign of courage and strength.
Myth(ish): “I can fix my problems myself.”
Fact: It is natural to not know how to do some things, and seeing a mental health professional with specialized knowledge can help you see your blind spots and work towards your goals as well as improved wellness and satisfaction in life.
This may very well be true. To figure out if therapy could be helpful to you, I would ask you:
1. How long have you been struggling with this problem?
2. How much distress or dysfunction is the problem causing you?
3. Do you have the time, energy, and resources to spend figuring the problem out and following through on the plan you make to make a change?
If your answers are, something like a few weeks or months, mild-moderateish distress/disfunction, and yes to question #3, then you may not need therapy. Though if you have been stuck and haven’t changed, are experiencing a good bit of distress and/or issues with functioning, and answered no to #3, it may be time to get honest with yourself and consider doing something differently.
I am going to cite my previous explanation here as well. If my car stopped working, I could spend the time to troubleshoot what is going on, watch some YouTube tutorials, order the parts I need, and figure out what needs to be done to make the repairs, but by the time it is maybe complete, I would have had to spend hours upon hours learning and applying this specific knowledge, waiting for the delivery of the part, and making mistakes as well as having to fix those mistakes, all just to risk it not working out or the car not being able to be safely driven. When, instead, I could have just taken my car up the street to the mechanic where there would be people with specialized knowledge who could, much more quickly than I, be able to identify the issue and repair it in a matter of a few hours or a couple of days.
Going to therapy isn't too different from that. Some people go for years, decades, or even lifetimes struggling in silence. It doesn’t have to be that way for you.
Myth: Therapy is only for severe mental illness or “crazy people”
Fact: Therapy supports everyday challenges like stress, problems in relationships, feeling purposeless, burnout, and more, not just clinical diagnoses
I have unfortunately heard this more than I would like to admit. Every time, I tend to reply with “No actually. The people that I work with are people just like you and me.” This is true. Therapy is designed to meet people where they are. More often than not, this looks like issues that all or many of us struggle with at some point. Some examples include:
Adjusting to a big life change, like going to college, having kids, or going through a divorce
Learning how to show up more effectively in relationships
Figuring out your identity, purpose, or meaning
Learning how to deal with stress related to your work, or exploring different careers altogether
Developing more positive self-esteem and/or learning how to change unhelpful negative thoughts
Working towards personal goals that you have
& more!
Myth: Therapy takes forever and is expensive
Fact: Therapy can come in many different forms, including solution focused or structured treatment that has a set beginning and end. There are affordable options and resources including free and low cost options.
Therapy length and cost depend on many different factors, though depending on your personal goals, the issues you want to work on, the work you are willing to put in outside of therapy and your therapist’s approach, you can absolutely make tangible progress that you can see and feel. I would recommend talking to your potential therapist in the initial consultation/intake about their treatment modalities, possible length(s) of time for treatment and collaborate with them to figure out what is best for you. Your therapist is responsible for making a treatment plan, reviewing it with you, and checking in with you often about your progress.
Therapy can be expensive, like seeking help from many different types of professionals can be, though there are options. If you aren’t using insurance, I would recommend talking to potential therapists about their sliding scale options. Even if they do not have sliding scale availability, often they can point you in the direction of someone who does. Other options to make therapy more affordable include going to therapy bi-weekly, finding a solution focused or structured therapist that utilizes shorter term treatment, or seeking out counseling from an intern or provisionally licensed professional who is under supervision. Some communities offer free or low cost services to those that are having a difficult time finding accessible mental health care. You can find these by searching for local community clinics and/or by utilizing local organizations to find lists of resources in the area. Often, local government organizations and schools have these lists.
Myth: A therapist is just going to tell me what to do
Fact: A good therapist would not instill their own values. Instead, they help you figure out what could work best for you
A counselor may advise or guide you in specific areas related to things that are good for your overall wellbeing, but any good mental health professional will help you learn to trust yourself and make decisions that are guided by your own values and goals.
Myth: If I go to a therapist, they will fix me.
Fact: A therapist is going to give you the space, skills, and resources for you to create the change that you want.
I have heard this in my experience more than a few times now, and often not in a way that is intended to be negative. I find that many clients tend to expect that they come to see me and automatically improve because of something that I am doing. While this can be true for many people, that just having a dedicated space with a trusted person that is focused on yourself is enough to create change, I find that most people change because of the work that they put into showing up for themselves - both inside and out of the therapy room. Although I so wish sometimes that I could wave a magic wand and make things better, I think that would defeat the purpose of helping you step into values and behaviors that align with what you want your life to be.
Myth: Going to therapy means that someone will diagnose me.
Fact: Not everyone who goes to therapy receives a diagnosis.
This depends on a couple of factors, including if you will be using insurance or not. If you do have insurance and choose to use it for therapy, then yes, insurance companies require a diagnosis in order for you to use your benefits. If you are cash or private pay, you possibly could receive a diagnosis, but maybe not. Not everyone who goes to therapy receives a diagnosis, and not every therapist focuses on diagnosing. Talk to your therapist about your preferences and if you have any concerns related to diagnosis and/or treatment.
Myth: Going to therapy is just venting.
Fact: Therapy can include talking, skills practice, behavioral practice, and being challenged, among other things.
While therapy does include talking and venting, your therapist isn't just there to let you vent. We prioritize helping you grow through helping you learn more about yourself and your patterns, providing practical skills and tools, and sometimes, we challenge the unhelpful and unrealistic things you think and/or do.
Myth: I can use AI for therapy, and it would be just as good.
Fact: While AI can be helpful, it is not a suitable replacement for therapy.
AI can be a good tool for use alongside therapy, especially related to setting goals and learning, but artificial intelligence programs are not mental health professionals. They can be (and often are) wrong. Many AI models are trained to tell you exactly what you want to hear, so they may encourage you to do things that are harmful.
Further than that, currently, most of the major AI platforms that currently exist are not confidential. I’ll say that again. The information you give to platforms are used to train AI models, potentially stored in databases, potentially sold to other companies and organizations, and could be used as incriminating evidence, among potentially being stored in other places that we may be unaware of. This means that really important information could be used against you in ways that could be harmful to you.
Lastly, I believe that part of healing that comes with therapy can be due to the nature of being witnessed by another human being. Going to therapy and working through painful things can be uncomfortable, hard, messy and extremely vulnerable at times. Talking to AI instead of a real person removes one of the most essential elements of why therapy works. In vulnerability, we feel vulnerable because we know that we could be opening ourselves up to potential hurt. Part of the magic of therapy comes from meeting these fears and pushing through them anyways - and being met with kindness, empathy, and non-judgement. AI programs can not be any of these because they lack the ability to actually feel and make judgements.
Meet The Writer
Cassie serves as the clinical director and co-founder of Real Talk Counseling & Wellness in Dawsonville, Georgia. Additionally, she works with her own clients, specializing in adult mental health, LGBTQIA+, trauma/PTSD, and working with working professionals, business owners & high achieving adults. In her free time, she enjoys writing, reading, playing video games, and playing pickleball with her husband and friends.
Comments